FORGET ABOUT IT

ADAM & STEVE



I'm still wonderin' why our local distributor got interested to show this in our cinemas? Adam & Steve is probably one of the worst movies I've ever seen. It's excruciating and I totally hate this one.

Is this a funny film? According to their poster that this is an all out comedy. Fun Fun Fun... Huh? Are they brainsick? The movie sucks coz it's ho-hum after that one highlight at the start. At least they managed to have one unforgettable scene. I admit I actually chuckled on that one particular gross scene. It is so disgusting that I somehow laughed but I did not enjoy it honestly. It makes me puke.

The movie is so campy. This is not a discreet gay film like Brokeback Mountain & Shelter. So if you're homophobic, just stay away from this one. This will disgust you to death. I did not enjoy the screenplay at all. I don't know who will enjoy this crap. The plot is about 2 gays. They meet in 1987 and have a disastrous one night stand. After 20 years, they meet up again but fail to recognize each other and eventually they fall in love. Simple but atrocious. Believe me this is a waste of time.



Oh by the way, the two actors are quiet good coz they are so comfortable in their respective roles. Steve is being played by Malcolm Gets. I don't know this indie actor but he looks good on camera. Adam is played by Craig Chester. He also wrote and directed this one. So basically he is the gay M.Night Shyamalan without the weird twists in the story . He is also a horrendous director. Craig is so vexatious in the screen. His character is being thrown with wine glasses coz they despise gay people like him. Actually, I wanna smash one bottle too on his face. I'm not that prejudiced but I just can't stand him. He irks me a lot.



Surprisingly, they have 2 outstanding supporting roles played by Parker Posey and Chris Kattan. They are refreshments from that skanky Adam. Don't expect shtupping scenes here because this is a gay indie film. I'd rather not witness a horrible bed scene with those actors. Thanks “Adam from the Garden of Eden” coz they don't have a graphic one.

I also disapprove the excessive use of drugs in this movie. I don't get it why they include those unnecessary scenes about drug abuse. Grrr.....



There's a dance musical scene too which is very stupid and pathetic. It's the most horrible thing I've ever seen in a movie.

The DVD is already out a long time ago in the US. You can even pick some bootlegs here. Just don't waste your time with this one but if you're curious about that one highlight you can watch this but I don't guarantee satisfaction in the end.



This is my only opinion. I'm not against with the gay community. This is just a wrong project. Just forget it.

RATING : 1 / 5 *

INCOMPLETE MUMMY MADNESS

THE MUMMY: TOMB OF THE DRAGON EMPEROR

9 years ago “The Mummy” was raised from the ashes. It was a good introduction to the world. I even enjoyed it. After 2 years, “The Mummy” returns back with a vengeance and unleashed a wild phenomenon. The sequel was a blockbuster hit worldwide. Rachel Weisz became a Hollywood sensation too and she received a lot of movie offers and award-winning films. She is now an Academy Award Winner but she quiet shunned the new Mummy franchise. I missed her. Really missed her here.

The O'Connells must stop a mummy awoken from a 2,000-year-old curse threatens to plunge the world into his merciless, unending service. Our favorite adventurous family explorer lead by Rick, Evelyn & Alex is on their third explosive journey yet. This time the conquest is in the heart of Asia: CHINA. Hollywood these days is conquering the land of porcelain and dragons. Last year, China was marooned via boob tube in Survivor. Then, earlier this year, two of their superstars joined forces to star in an awful Chinese Narnia movie called “The Forbidden Kingdom” China went animated at summer's kick off with Kung Fu Panda. Then coming on the 8th day of the 8th month of 2008, Summer Olympics' fire will unite the world once again in China too. But before that immense conglomeration, China is going to be flickered again at the big screen before the summer ends in “The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor.

The new “Mummy” film also has a new director. Rob Cohen who is the auteur of The Fast and The Furious, Dragonheart and XXX was offered to picture the new Mummy. Is he better than Stephen Sommers who made the first 2 films? No! He just made an eye candy Mummy without any exhilaration at all. The movie did not create a lot of surprises and guffaws compared to the last Sommers' Mummy movie. It isn't hilarious and it is quiet serious. This film didn't even surpass the energy in the previous Mummies. Something is lacking and something is missing.

Let's talk about the cast. I really prepared myself for Brendan Fraser coz I despised him in “Journey to the Center of the Earth”. Thanks God that he did not overdo this time. I missed the perky Chris O’Connell. He is so serious this time. In fact he is overshadowed by Jet Li and Michelle Yeoh. I am so thankful that Jet Li is speaking Chinese here because his English accent is very atrocious . Maria Bello is surprisingly “just there”. She's no Rachel Weisz but she created a new Evy. There is no chemistry between Maria and Brendan too. Their son is a grown-up hunk now. Is he hot? Hmmm... Luke Ford is a good catch. He is a dead ringer for Chris O’Donnell. He is promising.

TECHNICAL SYNOPSIS

1 Costume Design – Totally awesome

2 Sound –Thunderous and grandiose in a Dolby Cinema like in The Block. Amazing!

3 Cinematography – Just pleasing

4 Editing – Slightly copacetic

5 Musical Score – China Inspired and good but forgettable

6 Screenplay – boring and insipid 7 Production Design – I really appreciate everything! It's fantastic especially the Shangri-la view.

7 Visual Effects – Oscar Worthy! Hands down!

This movie promises a cinematic event based on the trailer. Unfortunately, it's all in there. I don't loathe this honestly. I am just ambivalent. Seriously, watching Michelle Yeoh's spell for the buried dead slaves is truly grand. I had goose bumps watching the awakening. I uttered: Oh this is it!!! OMG! This is really spellbinding. Then after a few minutes the movie ended. Huh? That's it? Give me a break! I want more! I think the TPTB doesn't care about the suspense. They just want to please the eyes of the audience with their highly budgeted effects.

This is a film made for the “general blockbuster crowd”. This is a palpable popcorn flick. Just enjoy the ride coz the movie is still worth the dough if based only on production design, sound & visual effects.

RATING: 2.5 / 5 *

ALL-HEART A$$HOLE

HANCOCK



I got free passes for this movie that's why I took the advantage. I wasn't really planning to watch this but when I read recently that it already earned $371M worldwide in just 3 weeks. Hey, I think it's time for me to meet this extraordinary superhero named Hancock.

Finally, I have met John Hancock. He lives in Los Angeles. He is always drunk and people are calling him “a$$hole”. Yeah, that's him. He has superhuman powers just like Superman but the only problem is that he is an a$$hole. He is a vigilante superhero but instead of receiving thanks from the people he saves he always get curse and most of the time subpoenas from the city. He causes so much damages from stopping criminals.



The first half of the film is very hilarious and superior. Yeah, Hancock is “a pain the ass” like Lindsay, Paris & Britney but you would still love him and them( the 3 party girls). Will Smith totally nailed a wonderful performance. Honestly, I can't stand this actor but after watching The Pursuit of Happyness I changed my mind. Smith is the perfect Hancock. I like his character coz sometimes I'm also an a$$hole. Just kidding!



The 3 leads I must say are very interesting. Jason Bateman who plays Ray who was saved by Hancock from a train collision is captivating as Hancock's advisor. He wanted to change Hancock's image. I'm not even familiar with Bateman but I think I will check his previous movies now. He is a fine actor. Charlize Theron is astonishing as Mary. She plays Ray's wife. In the first half, the director's style of showing close-up with her in her watery eyes suddenly gives the audience a clue. Actually, I predicted for a twist to come. Indeed, Theron's character is the one to watch out for. It shocked me a little but I expected it anyway. This film needs a real shocker. I'm glad they have one.



The visual effects of the film are really mesmerizing. All 'viseff-lovers” will love those scenes. They are breathtaking and very much gratifying.

You know what? I cried here. The drama really touched my heart. I didn't expect to shed tears after laughing to numerous scenes. Maybe because the music is really good. I love the original score. It is moving and congruous to the highlights. I really waited for the end credits and I was surprised that John Powell penned the music. He is really talented.

I am familiar with Peter Berg's projects and I'm very sure that this is the first time that he directed a film with enormous support from visual effects. His style is still there but the only problem is that he was lost after the first half. The second half of the film kills me after that “surprise twist”. I don't know but I didn't like it. It fells like it was rushed and it looks stupid. That's just me.



Still, the film manages to be coherent at the end. Hancock is an enjoyable film. Just sit back and relax coz there is a change for everything. This is not your typical superhero film. Maybe, this will surprise you. This film has a heart.

To all “loners” out there like me: THIS IS OUR MOVIE!!!!

Fly with Hancock now!

RATING : 4 / 5 *

THE OTHER NATIONAL TREASURE

FOOL’S GOLD



What happens when two Hollywood celebrities team up again after their blockbuster film that they had recently made? It's not unusual in Hollywood but in “Manilawood” huh? Where the hell is this? Of course we have so much love teams here. What I'm talkin' here is that after their megahit “How To Lose Guy In 10 Days”, Kate & Matthew are back again to sizzle the screen or maybe not.

Their first movie I must say is refreshing and they have an unbelievable chemistry which is really good. In Fool's Gold, there is zilch. I'm wondering why their magical oomph vanished here. Matthew is always half-naked and he is also totally naked in one scene but it's really quick so don't expect to ogle something shiny as gold. Just forget it. Matthew is not that attractive here. He looks dorky and stupid even if his character is smart.



Kate Hudson I must say is the saving grace. She acts naturally and she's effulgent like gold. She's versatile coz she did some underwater scenes and I think that she would be great as an action star just like Angelina Jolie.



Fool's Gold is all about treasure hunting mixed with some 2nd chance love affair flair. This is almost comparable to Walt Disney's National Treasure coz of the puzzle clues .. They have to decode a lot of clues hidden somewhere. The only difference is that the latter is exciting and funny while this one is only hilarious if that starlet acting like Paris Hilton is making some stupid dumb lines. Yeah, I get it. They palpably spoofed the rich hotel heiress. Poor girl. Well, I really enjoyed her when she's acting like a schmuck. She's cute to watch.



This film is directed by Andy Tennant. Well, he is quiet good here but the story is just so lame and predictable. It killed his talent. Andy impressed me when he directed Ever After & Sweet Home Alabama. His touch didn't turn into gold instead it turned out to be a fake copper in here.Too bad.



This film may be loved by all beach lovers out there. Yeah, Bahamas is a great destination for an ultimate vacation. I love the pristine sea and the white sands are just tempting. I would definitely swim naked in that beach. It's really really gorgeous. What? They didn’t shoot this in the Bahamas? In Queensland instead? That’s weird! I'm really into beach that's why I got enthusiastic in this movie.


By the way, this film topped the US Box Office on its first weekend despite its negative reviews.

The DVD is out now. Am I recommending this? Yeah, just borrow or rent this one.

RATING : 2.5 / 5 *

21 FLAVORS

21




Across the universe there should be a way how to beat the dealer. Trick the Black Jack and cash your chips! That's Las Vegas! Welcome to the City of Sin and taste the 21 Flavors of Money. “21” is a film about temptation and making a crucial decision. This is a film for casino lovers and maybe for some Jim Sturgess and Kate Bosworth admirers. Yeah, that's me.

Ben Campbell is a diligent student from MIT. He excels in Math & Science related subjects in college. He is accepted into Harvard Medical School. The big problem is that he needs $300,000 for his tuition. He has a part-time job in a suit shop but it's still not good enough for college. His only way is to pass the full scholarship in which he is really qualified. But everything has changed when he was called to a secret tryst. Ben is being cajoled to join a group of students who are doing unapproved extra-curricular activities in Las Vegas. Their mission? Beat the Black Jack dealer and win enormous amount of dough. And how would they do that? That's the secret of 21.



Five students acting like cons are being lead by Prof. Micky Rosa played by Kevin Spacey. He is definitely a bright actor. I enjoyed his role here coz he is quiet bad. Jim & Kate plays Ben & Jill respectively. The other 3 students are there but they can be ignored if you want to. They are forgetful in some ways maybe because they are unknown actors.



Jim Sturgess gives a marvelous performance. There' s something in him that makes you love him as an actor. He is really good. If you enjoyed his singing in “Across The Universe”, well, you won't be disappointed with his charm in “21”. He dares to be sexy here but it's just too short. No, I didn't imply about his wiener I mean that scene is just too short. Ha ha ha! Just look at the way he smiles in the film. I bet all the ladies and some dude will thaw. Jim rocks!



Kate Bosworth??? Hmmm...she's already good enough to make me like the film. She's not the best actress in the world but you gotta love the pulchritude of this girl. She isn't also dreadful here. She is scorching I must say.



The gambling scenes are not that breathtaking but it's just amusing to watch. I just adore the youthful cinematography of Las Vegas. It's colorful and inviting.



I expected for a beautiful OST but I didn't hear remarkable songs in the film. I think they didn't prepare for this.

This is directed by Robert Luketic by the way. He is the one responsible for the phenomenal “Legally Blonde”. I still love watching that film. It's really cute. The film is inspired by the true story of the MIT Blackjack Team too.

“21” is not a film for everyone. It has a specific target audience.

I'm recommending this to all exemplary high school and college studes. If you are currently groping in a dark labyrinth, this film will lighten your way. That's what I think. Give it a try. It won't harm you nonetheless.

RATING : 4 / 5 *

A SCENTED MURDER

PERFUME: THE STORY OF A MURDERER



This film really intrigued me coz it already earned $100M in Europe alone. That's enormous you know. I didn't even know that popular actors are also in this film. I think I really missed a lot. Such a shame for a movie buff like me. Anyway, the DVD is out and I finally got a spray from a bloody perfume.

“Perfume” is a film adaptation of Patrick Süskind's best-selling 1985 novel of the same title. But I haven't read it so let's skip it. This is directed by Tom Tykwer who really gave a solid direction. I like his work on Run Lola Run. He is really amazing and I love his masterpiece.

The best thing about watching this film is that you want to smell it. Yeah, your nose is wanting for the scent too. We can see the beauty and hear the awesome sound but the scent is really inviting. This is really beautiful from start to finish. The script is fascinating even if our lead character who has a strong sense of smell doesn't speak that much.
Ben Whishaw simply gives a impeccable performance .

Why I really love this? The style is original and really unique. The murders are really disturbing but in the same time you'll appreciate the dark mood. Weird huh?



How did he murder the 13 beautiful and virginal young women? I won't spill any details but all Jean-Baptiste Grenouille (our main character )really wanted is the invigorating scent of these women. It' s really perturbing when you see him doing the act.



Great cast I must say. I didn't expect Dustin Hoffman to be here. At first I didn't recognize him as Baldini the Italian perfumer. He is just a cameo here. Alan Rickman also gave a strong performance as a father to a very surprising Rachel Hurd-Wood. Yeah, she is here as the object of affection of Grenouille. Rachel is pleasing coz she's now a lady. I first saw her as this beautiful young girl in Peter Pan.. Remember her now? Yeah, she's the cute Wendy. I've got a crush on her right now.



If the murders are disturbing then watch out for the great ORGY! OMG! I was shocked to see that scene! It's really unbelievable but it's really there. Great direction! Great execution from hundreds of extras. I can't still get over it. Hundreds of naked bodies having lavish sex in the plaza is indescribable.



The filthy cinematography in the film looks great too. The dark musical score is quiet good but there's no hook for me.



I hope you'll have time to try this amazing perfumed film. It's really great watching this applaudable masterpiece.

Highly Recommended

RATING: 5 / 5*

TUCK YOUR T-BACK DUDE!

JOHN TUCKER MUST DIE



I never thought that I would relish this movie. This flick is really trying to be “Mean Girls” but it isn't good enough. However, it isn't really that atrocious. I like this one. Thanks to Jesse Metcalfe.



John Tucker is a high school Lothario who I want to date too for some “buddy bonding”. Just kidding. His character is really charming for me. Jesse Metcalfe is really cute and amiable. He is dating girlfriends with his unique Tucker way so that they don't find out about each other. But when three of his girlfriends know about his cheating they decided to get their revenge on John. I overlooked this film last year and I still don't know why. I enjoyed Jesse Metcalfe as John in The Desperate Housewives that's why I was kinda raring about this. The critics shunned this actually but who cares coz this is just a fun movie.



Some scenes are really mirthful for me. It's just astounding that you would fall for John Tucker. He is a womanizer but you would still feel sympathy for him. The script is not as ingenious as Mean Girls but it has a little appeal.



I love watching the 3 bitches here. They are really good. Arielle Kebbel who plays the brainy reporter has some potentials in the big screen. Surprisingly, Ashanti looks beautiful most of the time. Sophia Bush I think shines the most coz of her adroit bitchy lines. Britanny Snow who plays Kate as the makeover girl is really really cute.



I didn't expect this film to be flabbergasting but not in a spooky way. If you've been the following the teen hit “Gossip Girl, well, expect to scream coz Penn Badgley is here with a weird haircut! Gosh! I was really giggling when I realized that this is Serena's BF playing a nred. He is really eldritch here. XO XO.

Jenny McCarthy who plays Kate's mother is definitely hot .



Is this worth seeing? Definitely the teens will love this! I am recommending this one. Well, if you've been wearing thong/t-back for 3 years now “John Tucker Must Die” is movie for me I mean for you. Am I wearing a thong? He he he... ask John Tucker!

RATING : 3.5 / 5*

A SPOOKY PARKING GARAGE

P2

Do you work late at night? What do you feel going into the spooky dark parking lot all alone? Do you look outside once you are inside the car? What if terror awaits you in that creepy garage located at the basement of your building? P2 is a film about a Christmas horror set in a parking garage. This is a little masterpiece to enjoy and maybe scream!

The story of P2 happens on Christmas Eve. Angela played by Rachel Nichols, I remember her as the sexy girl in the remake of The Amytyville Horror, is working late. She's the last one to leave the building but her car won't start. Why not take the subway instead??? But we won't have a film right? So she asks for help from Tom played by Wes Bentley, the parking garage security guard, but turns out to be her stalker. Can she survive and defeat the craziness of her creepy bloody admirer?

If you are familiar with the style of Scream & I Know What You Did Last Summer, this is just the same but with a strange concept. They make the parking garage so creepy. There is still tension in the movie. I wasn't shouting like hell but sometimes my heart was pounding. Some gory scenes are really disturbing. This is not good for kids by the way. Since the parking garage is only a small place to play hide & seek, our heroine is just running from one level to another then comes down and up, then hide and tries to call 911. It is a cat and mouse bloody game. But still it gave me goose bumps. I must say that the director did good coz the terror is really effective even if it's a recycled trick.

Rachel Nichols is amazing as Angela. You can feel her sufferings too. If you can remember Jessica Biels' character in The Texas Chainsaw Massacre well they are comparable but I think Rachel got my early sympathy. Wes Bentley is good but his lines are cheesy. His dog is fucking scary! I hate that dog! P2 is not a bad movie. It is palpably budgeted so low but the art is still there. There are loopholes in the movie like the lack of fire alarm buttons which are really necessary in a huge building. I'm still wondering why Angela didn't bother to alarm it.Well, we won't have a film right?

I'm recommending P2 coz it is a good movie.

Just give it a try if you have time.

RATING : 3.5 / 5 *